Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
