I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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