we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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