We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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