somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
