Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
