Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
