she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
