Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The air was thick with penises
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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