Whoa Z and x make the same sound
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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