But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I got chris browned last night
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
