I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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