I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize