could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
