They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
