Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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