Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize