why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
