If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
