He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
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This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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