i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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