did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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