I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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