I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
