I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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