lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
