Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You need a sexual gate keeper
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Randomize
