Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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