that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
