lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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