yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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