I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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