Michael Bay diarrhea
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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