this just has baby written all over it
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
