My balls are so social today.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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