it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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