my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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