my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
