so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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