I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
