I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
