I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
