This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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