Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i think i have two assholes
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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