Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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