Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
