Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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