ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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