My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
