By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
