a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
