so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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