He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize